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تاریخ ارسال:خرداد ۲, ۱۴۰۲
General Tips
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Be sure to use a variety of connectors to link ideas effectively.Tip
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Be sure to use a variety of complex grammar structures.Tip
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Be sure to use a variety of advanced vocabulary.Tip
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You have used a range of advanced vocabulary accurately and effectively.Tip
Overall Score: 7
Overall, your essay is well structured and you have used a range of complex grammar and advanced vocabulary accurately and effectively.
You have answered the question well and have provided a balanced view of the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. You have also provided your opinion on whether the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
Undoubtedly developments have improved living conditions for the residents; however, these advancements have had their own negative impacts that must be taken into consideration.
Improving your writing skills
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The essay addresses the task requirements, but could have included more details regarding how the advantages and disadvantages of tourism can outweigh each other.Tip
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The ideas in the essay were reasonably developed but could have included more explanations and/or examples to support the ideas in the essay.Tip
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The essay contains some clear ideas and explanations but also includes some digressions and overgeneralizations. Suggested corrections include more development of ideas, removal of digressions, and addition of examples.Tip
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The introduction paragraph contains a clear thesis but could have included more details.The conclusion is satisfactory and provides a good summation of the essay.Tip
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Additional tips to further improve the essay include expanding and providing more details and examples in the body paragraphs to support the main point better, and to include more information in the introduction paragraph.Tip
You have used a range of complex grammar structures accurately and effectively.
Mistakes: 1. Unarguably, the tourism industry can accelerate economic - Unquestionably, the tourism industry can significantly accelerate economic - The word 'unarguably' is too strong and does not fit within the context, and 'significantly' provides a better alternative to imply the intensity of the impact. 2. Arrival of travellers is capable - Arrival of travelers is capable - 'Travellers' should be' travelers' in order to stay true to the American Standard English. 3.Travelers expenditure - Travelers' expenditure - Here, 'travelers' should have an apostrophe to make clear who the expenditure belongs to: the travelers. 4. Therefore, residents of these areas would be able to live better lives without leaving there homelands. - Therefore, residents of these areas would be able to live better lives without leaving their homelands. -Here, the spelling of 'there' should be 'their'. 1. Improve sentence flow by creating transition sentences such as 'In addition,', 'On the other hand,' etc. 2. Include more personal opinion to substantiate the arguments and achieve a higher band score. 3. Work on the introduction and conclusion to make it more definitive and directly relevant to the essay prompt. 4. Introduce a counter-argument to make the essay more balanced and accurate.
You have used a variety of cohesive devices to ensure the essay flows well. You have used a range of discourse markers to show the relationships between ideas.
Examples: Furthermore, Moreover, Consequently, Therefore.
You have used a range of complex grammar structures accurately and effectively.
Examples: The growing interest of visitors in new and lesser-seen destinations has triggered drastic changes in these locations. Arrival of travellers is capable of increasing job opportunities in less populated locations. Once the area starts to gain traction, authorities also start working in the construction of infrastructures and improvement of public services.